Does this sound like you?
You give a trusted member of your team an assignment to solve a complex issue. You explain that you are too busy to deal with it, and would like them to take care of it however they see fit.
You are rushed (as always) and light on detail, but know they’ll figure it out.
Plus, you are happy to give them the opportunity to show what they are capable of, while loosening your grip on at least one of the tasks you face as a business leader.
At the first check-in, your employee proudly shares their plan and the steps they have already taken.
It’s all wrong.
“Why would you do that?” You ask. “Why wouldn’t you do this?”.
It’s a reasonable question. They explain their thinking to you.
“I wouldn’t do it that way” you respond. “I’m just warning you that it probably won’t work out.”
Seeking clarity, they ask. “How do you want me to handle it?”
“It’s really up to you. This is your project.” you snap back, feeling like you once again made the mistake of letting someone else do something only you can do.
I call it Back Seat Driving.
As leaders, Back Seat Drivers expect you to know where they want to go, but only tell you when you take a wrong turn.
Think about the position your employee is in:
They are trying to figure out whether your comments were suggestions, recommendations, or direct instructions. And in that, they must figure out whether your comments were suggestions, recommendations, or direct instructions. They quickly reflect on their past experience and the experiences of others within the organization to determine whether they should: a) do what they think is right to deliver the best result for the business, or b) do what the boss thinks is right so they can live to fight another day.
What a conundrum. There isn’t a good answer. Albeit noble to put the interests of the business first, people lose their jobs all the time for crossing the boss.
This is the opposite of employee empowerment.
This isn’t you. Of course you don’t do this. But here is the thing… Maybe you have been told you tend to micromanage a bit too much. Or maybe you have lamented how your staff just don’t get it, or commented on how you can’t trust your people to be on their own. Maybe you feel like everything will fall apart if you don’t have your hands on it.
You might have legitimate concerns, but Back Seat Driving isn’t the answer.
You’ll only create doubt, confusion and frustration among your team. And sometimes it’s the right thing to do is to let the chips fall. If it fails, it’s a lesson learned for the employee, and it might just succeed, in which case it’s a lesson learned for you.
So if you care to, ask yourself ‘Am I a Back Seat Driver?’ Better yet, ask your team. Hopefully you’ll get some honest feedback.
The opposite of a Back Seat Driver is someone who delivers their expectations with clarity and then trusts their staff to own the solution – offering support as needed.
They say things like ‘I’m not sure, what do you think?’ and ‘Have you considered this?’ or ‘What would happen if…?’.
Curing your back seat driving tendencies can be easy if you give it some thought and attention.
First, ask yourself if you behave this way with multiple people or just one. If it’s just one, spend a few minutes thinking about whether you can actually trust that employee enough to let them run with something. If not, find out why.
If it’s a universal behaviour, take a step back and look at the bigger picture. What is triggering this behaviour? How much help are you actually providing? What are the repercussions of leading this way?
The next time you want to give someone a project, set a meeting to clearly outline the goal and any expectations or guardrails you might have. Give your employee the opportunity to ask questions and troubleshoot without judgement. Communicate that you understand your back seat driving tendencies, and that you are working on changing them. Make sure they are clear on what needs to be done, then let them know you trust them. Trust is key.
Wrap up the meeting by asking them if they have everything they need to get the job done, and if you can be of any support.
Think of yourself as a project sponsor – you don’t own it, but you can help clear obstacles when called upon.
At times where you are able, the right thing to do is to let the chips fall. If the project fails, it’s a lesson learned for the employee. If they succeed, it’s a lesson learned for you.
Finally, ask them to schedule check-ins to provide you with updates.
In other words, give them the destination and let them drive. You might be surprised when they find a better route.
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Rob Drynan is the Founding Partner at BeachHead Strategic.
BeachHead helps owner-operated businesses implement a management framework – a set of tools and processes that make growing your business faster, easier and more fun.